Match Report: Wednesday 14th July

Matt’s non-bibs: 3
Buncie’s bibs: 3

Matt’s non-bibs: Matt, Big Dave, Will, Rich C, Little Dave, Tom, Pretty boy, Roy, Sam
Buncie’s bibs: Rich B, Kev C, Brett, Jonny, Steve J, Paul, Towney, Ed, Phil

Remember the good old days of hard fought matches? The likes of Viera vrs Keane going at it from the first whistle? Well this week’s encounter at Oaklands proved to be up there with them.

After last weeks shambolic team picking, Matt passed the buck of responsibility to Phil, who dutifully put the non-bibs a man up until Steve J arrived and, like a child who’s just got his Buzz Lightyear toy for Christmas, handed Steve a bib. Cue groans all round from Will, Pretty boy and the rest of the non-bibs. The teams lined up like gladiators – possibly because it seemed everyone wanted to play defence and with Tuvvy, Steve Sav, Gavin and Jason all missing, maybe that was the case.

The match started with more respect than when Aretha Franklin played R.E.S.P.E.C.T. at the Respect concert in 1978 (may not be true). Plenty of good movement and passing, but the defences stood firm. Then, the opening goal – a lovely move through the middle, found Little Dave at the end of the gorgeous cross from PB and his finish was left to fly into the top corner by a quite frankly useless Phil in net. 1-0.

Risen from their stupor like a boxer who’d been jabbing and suddenly hit with a big right, the bibs began to build some kind of attack – only for non-bibs to break, Pretty Boy to drive a cross and Rich C get his head onto it – or was that, Rich C to get hit by a powerful shot-cum-cross? Either way, the ball flew over the bar and Rich C had claret to show for his efforts of the night. Rumour has it that he then headed into town to show off his wounds to any poor lass that ventured up to him to say “You poor puppy, what happened to you?” (possibly not true either)

Then the turning point of the game: As previously mentioned, Steve J arrived, took control of bibs and slid a lovely pass across to Towney arriving on the back post like a bearded ghost and slid the ball past a helpless Tom – 1-1.
The game was on a knife edge, Tom, Big Dave and Roy playing a great game in their half but unable to free the marauding Pretty Boy while Paul, Kev and Brett continued to try to free Ed and Towney. The teams on the match before had widened the pitch considerably which meant loads more room and didn’t feel as crowded as usual. Both teams were trying the expansive passing game, although Matt did manage one pass from right back that managed to sail into the net of the next pitch to his left – maybe a little too expansive, but that kind of pass will be needed on Saturday for the next big game.

It seemed to stay like this for about 20mins; and in that time non-bibs did most of the pressing. They had hundreds of corners – all repelled by Brett on his own. Then they got the break through they were looking for – Will, finally freed from his shackles at the back, drove forward. Bibs left trailing in his wake, he doesn’t normally wait for an invitation to shoot and this was no exception. As he let fly you could almost hear Jonny in net running away and the ball fairly screamed into the top corner. I’m sure everyone there will agree: goal of the game and 2-1 non-bibs.

Like a proper game of football though, having just scored, non-bibs went to sleep and almost immediately it was level again. This time Ed was given far too much room in the box, yet his finish past Sam was clinical and well deserved. Ed is beginning to show real signs of the kind of wing play of olden days – good close control, and ability to pass and move and now he’s finishing too – watch out Rich C, your place in the 11-a-side may well be under threat!
Another long period of stalemate developed and the evenness of the sides meant that they canceled each other out. Then a nice goal – and again non-bibs took the lead. As Matt texted me last night “Me to Will, will to churchy, nice control and slotted past Andy”. Our manager has a good memory for positive things that don’t involve him, and who am I to argue?

All looked lost for bibs – time was running out; Tom was marshaling his defensive line of Simon B, Sam and Will well and bibs were short of creativity. However, they had not counted for the non-bibs ability to hold onto a lead – about as good as Phil’s ability to hold onto his temper. The keeper rolled it to Tom, who was immediately pounced upon by Steve J. Various bits of skill were attempted by Tom to shake him off, but Steve had his prey locked tight in his metaphorical jaws. In the end, with much muttering, Tom fell over and Steve, bearing down on the keeper even had time to jump in the air and click his heels together three times whilst saying “There’s no place like home” before slotting the third equaliser of the game.

There was hardly time for Little Dave to try a speculative long range effort before the call of “Time gentlemen please” (a comment that always has Matt in tears, no matter where the location) and a 3-3 draw was written into history.
A really good game – lots of space meant that we had time to demonstrate how much better we have become. More importantly, despite some good crunching tackles, no-one was injured so Saturday’s match is a go-er!

Goal of the Game – See above and read the report instead of skimming to the end you lazy so-and-so

Man of the match – As usual a tough call. Brett was on hand to block most things and Steve J bossed the midfield for bibs. Paul and Kev played a great holding role. For non-bibs, Will and Tom looked extremely assured at the back, and PB had plenty to say (and sometimes in encouragement). However, Little Dave had a great game. He scored, intercepted and generally created lots of chances for non-bibs. Often, bibs found themselves with a good chance, only for LD to nip in and steal the ball. A quality performance Dave – well done.

Match Report by Phil McBride